Who Should Host Saturday Night Live

This is a list bloggers love to write cause we all have a strong opinion on this.  I’ve had my ideas for awhile, but after reading a few that did mention people I had in mind I realized they still left out some great would-be hosts!

For the record, I am leaving off certain people you know will host or host again. Like: Kristen Wiig, Tina Fey (future 5-timer), Amy Poehler, Jon Hamm. The list goes on.

I feel like I’m pretty good at coming up with future hosts because at the beginning of this season I said, “Adam Levine should host.” And he did. And he did a fine job. I also said a couple years ago that Justin Timberlake will one day join the 5-timers club and that they should do that sketch. And we all know that went this past Saturday. (answer: splendidly)
I’m evidently clairvoyant. Speaking of which, I will one day marry Anne Hathaway.

I’ve put together a list of people who either inexplicably have never hosted or inexplicably only hosted once.

  • Stephen Colbert – I put him first cause I’ve thought it for years, but so has every other person who puts together a list like this.
  • Will Arnett – Same as Colbert. No good reason he’s not hosted and everyone agrees.
  • Eddie Murphy – Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let’s move on to some more original suggestions.
  • Joel McHale – This would have been a great idea two seasons ago. He’d still do a good job, but the shine is off Community, it seems. Blerg
  • Michael Cera – He’s kinda hosted once. During the writer’s strike a few years back, SNL put on a benefit show to raise money for out of work crew and writers. They went to UCB, used an old SNL script and had Michael Cera host. And he apparently CRUSHED. No good reason he’s not hosted yet. They slept on the gouda on this one.
  • Nick Offerman – I don’t need to explain this.
  • Vince Vaughn – He hosted once in the 90’s and was good, but it was a year when people weren’t excited about SNL despite Ferrell being there. When Wedding Crashers hit big I thought he’d be hosting soon. Didn’t happen. Why, SNL? Make it so!
  • Aziz Ansari – He’s awesome. He’s great at sketches. He’s an obvious host. But he might need one more big splash before he gets to host.
  • Paul McCartney – Ok, ok. I know what you’ll say. But I’d love that and it’s totally plausible. It should have happened in the 90’s. But I’d still love it.
  • Adam Sandler – He has never hosted. I know, you’re about to check IMDB and see, but it’s true. He hasn’t. Weird, right?
  • Robert Downey Jr. – When Lorne Michaels came back to executive produce SNL in the mid-80’s RBj was actually a cast member alongside Anthony Michael Hall, who was surprisingly good. Downey has hosted. Once. IN 1996! Come on. 2 Iron Man movies and The Avengers and he’s still not hosted again?
  • Conan O’Brien – This should happen again. He did it once before and it was brilliant. Please just make it happen.
  • Lorne Michaels – When he steps down and Steven Higgins takes over as executive producer this should go down. Or maybe his last episode as EP.
  • Me, Jason Farr – This is the one person on this list that no one else has ever suggested. I’m tired of living vicariously through Timberlake. And with this suggestion I have made the “Who Should Host SNL” list that no one can top.

UPDATE: (cue that creepy music from Unsolved Mysteries)

Looks like SNL read my mind: Vince Vaughn to Host SNL in April. I must really be clairvoyant. I think it and it happens. This is the 3rd time. Uh oh, newly married Anne Hathaway! I’ve wrecked a marriage with my mind! What have I done!!

How My Heart Is Breaking This Week

It’s raining where I live and that doggone rain got that Brian McKnight song “One Last Cry” stuck in my head somehow.

At least I assumed it was the rain.  I have a strict Milli Vanilli policy in my house.  I always blame it on the rain.  I blame all good things on the boogie…not sunshine, not good times, not moonlight – the boogie!

So that sad, pedestrian old song about having one last cry before moving on was stuck in my head all because of the rain.  Or so I thought.

Then I saw THIS:  Anne Hathaway Engaged!!

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This is an outrage and that last line is the only way I can show my frustration!!  Really, Anne?  You couldn’t wait it out a little longer?  Give it some more time before meeting me?  Just had to go and get engaged!  Now who am I supposed to focus my energy on?  The girl I’m seeing? (I’m fine with that)

LISTEN!  The thing that’s really got me down (other than the internal bleeding that this engagement has caused) is that the whole time Anne Hathaway is on the screen in the next Batman movie as Catwoman I won’t be able to do anything but think, “Welp, I’ll never marry her now that she’s engaged…and because I’ll probably never meet her.”
You’re ruining Nolan’s last Batman movie, Anne!  I hope you’re happy!! (I’m sorry for yelling. Please come back.)

I’m more angry than sad…at least for now.

Tonight I’m getting a tub of ice cream and watching some Love Actually.  Cause Anne Hathaway is getting married to some poor man’s Ryan Gosling.

And that is how my heart is breaking this week.

I’m Hosting the Oscars Next Year!!!

With all the talk about the squabble between James Franco (Oscar Co-host) and Bruce Vilanch (long-time Oscar writer) I thought I’d mention why I hated this year’s telecast of the Oscars…in short, it blew.

I’m not blaming the hosts like everyone else.  Haven’t we been around long enough to know that the hosts don’t produce these shows usually?  Yeah, Niel Patrick Harris did when he hosted the Emmy’s, but if you read anything about this year’s Oscars you’d know Hathaway and Franco didn’t produce the show.
Are the people blaming the hosts the same people that think Conan and other talk show hosts are actually recording their shows at 11 or 11:30?  I bet they’re the same people who think stand up comedians come up with their jokes right on the spot…even when they’ve heard the comic do the joke before.
They thought Bruce Willis really died at the end of Sixth Sense.  Obviously, he died at the beginning when he was shot.  They just revealed he was dead the whole time at the end of the movie.  Maroons.

"Everybody say, 'Heeeeyyyy.'"

Anyway, I’m not blaming the hosts.  The problem is everyone knows Hathaway (who is lovely and glamorous) and Franco (who is James Dean above-it-all cool) are good SNL hosts, but the producers forgot that the people involved with producing an episode of SNL bother to write a funny show.

But not these producers.  They wanted to bore us to tears.  While watching this my mind actually fastforwarded to years down the road when I’m married, all of my friends have kids and we’re just bored, domesticated and the only exciting thing going on for us is watching the Oscars.
That’s what this telecast did to me that night.  I still love you, Anne Hathaway, but so help me if those producers get nominated for an Emmy for this.

You could tell they were trying to stay away from Ricky Gervais-like jokes insulting everyone, but instead insulted our own sense of what we consider entertainment.

Emmy producers, you succeeded at one thing that night.  Making me wish I was doing anything other than looking at something with Anne Hathaway.