There It Is!

I’ve started a podcast and it’s launching today! The podcast is for anyone interested in comedy! I interview guests and ask them how they create the work they create so those of us who also want to create comedy can learn how to do it!

New episodes will post every Tuesday! The first 3 are up now! I interview writer/comedian/actress Tess Rafferty who wrote the book “Recipes for Disaster” and appeared on E!’s “The Soup!” in the first episode. For the second episode I speak with former Late Night with Jimmy Fallon staffer, comedian Cory Cavin. Episode 3 has Kaila Mullady, the beat boxer for NYC Hip Hop improv troupe North Coast!

Head on over to www.ThereItIsPod.com and keep up with the podcast!

#OscarsSoWhite

There’s nothing wrong with being White. A lot of people are White. Your favorite teacher. Your boss. Your best friend. Blake Shelton. All of these people may very well be White. That’s just how many White people are out there. And I’m down with it.

I’m also into diversity. Diversity is a good thing. Particularly when it comes to the images we see on our TV, iPad, and movie screens. It’s important to have diversity in our entertainment and marketing so every group has a voice and is represented.
As a whole, America is a diverse place. The art and images that are supposed to represent our society should reflect that. The images in our movies, commercials or prints ads, and TV shows are modern day hieroglyphics. They’re creation makes them a time capsule of our era and culture. Because of this they should be accurate. Not so we can avoid “hurting feelings,” but to avoid being untrue…but, also, leaving people out of cultural representations is terrible.

Last year when the Oscar nominees were announced and everyone saw that they were more White than Montana a hashtag got started online, #OscarsSoWhite. The creator of the hashtag, April Reign, created it because she was disappointed in the lack of diversity on the list of nominees.
It was brought back to life again this year when the current crop of Oscar nominees was announced. Again, Montana.

To me, women and/or people of color not getting an Oscar isn’t a travesty. The subjugation of women and people of color in Hollywood is the problem.

The bigger issue simply is not about groups of people who are historically subjugated getting a glorified paperweight. It’s just a silly award, after all. Jerry Seinfeld put it best when he said, “Awards are stupid.” Even former and about to be Oscar host, Chris Rock, said it was stupid to give awards for art.
The pomp and circumstance of winning an Oscar has taken the nice act of patting someone on the back and saying, “Good job, your work was inspiring,” into a glorified exercise of the determining who are the Haves and who are the Have Nots. It’s become silly and I watch it every year!

Is it really that big of a deal to get an award? I mean, Nicolas Cage has one of those things!

Yes, and no. I’ve covered, “no,” by saying it is a little silly, so I’ll talk about how it is, in some respects, a big deal. It can be a big deal because it does help careers. But then again Nicolas Cage has done all the movies we make fun of him for after winning an Oscar, and it hasn’t done much for Cuba Gooding Jr. It’s also a big deal because it people climb a totem pole to get there. But that is a Hollywood politics thing. In the grand scheme of things that is still pretty silly. The things people are put through to climb that ladder are soul crushing.
However, on the lighter side, it is a moment for people to be encouraged for making inspiring work. Most of the time what has won has been legitimately good work, even when people largely think something else “should have won.” It’s significant to be told, “Your work is fine art” by the industry. That’s why it’s not a good thing for the women and people of color in Hollywood to be left out on that encouragement. They are a part of the culture, too. They are creating inspiring works of art, too.

Why isn’t there more diversity when it comes to Oscar nominations? There are a couple of reasons.

  1. The Makeup of the People Voting: 94% of Oscar voters are White, 76% are men, and the average age is 63. Who you are and where you are from may play a big role in what attracts you and what you relate to. I can see 63 year old White men being more interested in and impacted by “The Wolf of Wall Street” than “Selma.” I’m not saying White people can’t like Black things. Cause that’s stupid. I mean, Eminem. But what I am saying is who you are says a lot about what has the biggest impact on you. Race and background informs that a great deal. If you’re a rich, old, White man you probably aren’t voting for “Straight Outta Compton.”
  2. The Makeup of People in Films: There isn’t a lot of diversity in movies which lessens the opportunity for the Academy to nominate women and/or POC. There’s even less diversity when it comes to the people directing movies. Why does that happen? Well, bigotry does still exist. There are actually studio executives who have said in the last 10 years that “Black actors can’t ‘open’ movies.” Which means that a movie starring a Black actor won’t draw a big box office audience on the opening weekend and the film industry has set up a system that determines a films success by how much the film brings in it’s opening weekend of wide release. The same sort of thing has been said about films starring women. Which is really stupid and really, really stupid (don’t nay say my use of “Gone with the Wind.” The main character of this film is a woman).

The bigger problem is that people are being subjugated in Hollywood. If people are given more opportunity to make and star in films and be members of the Academy then this #OscarsSoWhite issue fixes itself.
A mostly White Oscars in itself isn’t an issue nor is it evidence that the system is bad, it’s a byproduct of a system that doesn’t work for women and/or people of color. What is more important than who gets awards is that future generations see our work and that that work reflects the diversity of our generation’s culture and society.

Try and Fail

All of our moms don’t know how to use technology. That’s the stereotype, but it’s actually true with my mom. She calls herself computer illiterate. She’s had a computer for a decade. If you bring up any technological advancement she will practically shy away from using it. She actually could if she tried, but she doesn’t try.

Some people won’t try to do something because they’re afraid they won’t be able to do it or they simply think they can’t.

The thing is, there is a very good chance that if they tried they could do it. The only surefire way to not do something is to never try to do it. You may fail, but that’s okay. It’s like the old proverb, “If at first you don’t succeed/try, try, try again.”

It’s better to try and fail than to never try at all.

Happiness is Accomplishing Things

I recorded an audio book for the first time and it went on sale today! It is titled Happiness: The Ultimate Guide on How to be Happy and Live a Fulfilling Life.

You can buy it here.

Check that out. My name is listed on a website I didn’t put together. It’s all official-like. I would love for you to listen to it! Who doesn’t want happiness? We all do! This book has a lot of advice on tips and techniques you can use to living a happier life. The tips are practical.

The book was written by Neo Monefa who did a lot of research to find the information we present in the audio book. It is available on Audible, iTunes, and Amazon!

Watch What Happens

We all know no one cares about Thanksgiving anymore. These days Halloween celebration gets cranking in early October, then one week before Halloween you start to see Christmas stuff come out. Some radio stations and department stores play Christmas music around the clock all of November and obviously through December after hopping right over Thanksgiving.

The money makers ignore Thanksgiving because we hate Thanksgiving. People didn’t even spend time with their families today because they had to get in line for those deals that they could have found online that they couldn’t get anywhere so they were forced to stand in line for hours on end for a new TV.
Times they are a-changing and I predict that in a manner of years we’re going to see Thanksgiving become the holiday about giving thanks for all of the great deals we’re scoring at Best Buy and WalMart.

Maybe we should make the most of this trend and make it the holiday. What are we going to need to make this the new major holiday?

We need songs – Get on it, Adam Sandler!
We need decorations – All the new items you’ll buy! (there’s no money for extra decorations)
We need candy – Peanut butter filled dollar signs sound delicious.
We, of course, need a mascot – How about a a middle aged mom in sweats first in a long line at a store.

I can get on board with this, I guess, but I’m gonna be real hungry. If only there was a way to fit food into the day.

You Are an Old Man and a Fool!!

For the past 5 years people have guessed that I was 27 years old. Which is nice. Cause I’m not. I’m almost 10 years older than that. So, I’ll take it!

So when this How-Old.net thing came about I thought I’d test the waters. I thought I’d be fair and use a photo that was taken of me last month.

I've still got it.
I’ve still got it.

Nice! Even this bot thinks I’m 27. I think I’m falling in love with it. Is How-Old.net the younger sister of “Her” do you think? How old is “How-Old.net?” Is there a site that can guess the age of How-Old? A How-Old for How-Old, if you will?

I digress.

For giggles, I thought I’d see what age came up for someone who is actually 27 years old right now, Greg Oden! Let’s see!

Dang.
Dang.

Ouch! And this is from 2013-2014!! He’s 25/26 in this photo! I gotta give this guy something. Maybe it gets better when I use a picture from when he was younger.

Oops
Oops

Dang. One year? And this might be draft day for all I know. Dang. Sorry. Maybe he will fair better with a picture from when he was even younger? Like, maybe one when he was in high school.

He was 15!?!?
He was 15!?!?

NOPE! That is rough. Especially when you realize this picture was taken when he was 15 YEARS OLD!!

Greg Oden is just an old looking dude. I can’t help him. Old legs, old body, oldest face ever. Poor guy.
And according to Sports Illustrated Oden is working out and considering an NBA comeback.

To that I say what Thor once said to another famous Oden (or in this case Odin):

Things I Learned

I learn very little most of the time when I read an article on the internet. I usually already knew all of those “secret facts” about celebrities, and I didn’t want to learn them in the first place. Great, Conan O’Brien can tap dance. Who cares when the man can string dance like that? Focusing on his tap dancing is like focusing on how great Michael Jackson walked forward (which was called sunwalking).

Anyway, every so often you get that one article that actually teaches you a lot. For me today, it was “50 States, 50 Sandwiches,” on Zagat! (http://www.zagat.com/b/50-states-50-sandwiches)

Here are some things I learned:

Indiana can go to hell because it doesn’t even make since for them to have a “Philly” sandwich.
Sloppy Joe sounds a lot better than “Loose-Meat Sandwich.”
“The Hot Brown” is the worst sounding name for something that sounds delicious when described.
I’m sorry, but the word “pasty” is just not something I want used for something I could potentially eat.
A Philly Cheese steak isn’t even Pennsylvania’s best sandwich (making me question why anyone cares then)
This country loves pork.
I’m spending too much time on the internet.

“Let them eat cake,” I say!

I turned 35 this month and it was delicious!

Thanks to signing up for birthday coupons I got a free frozen yogurt, $10 off a meal, a free personal pizza, and a free cupcake. Thanks to generous and awesome friends I had a free beer or two and a free French doughnut and breakfast.

And then there’s the birthday cake from my mom. Oh, the birthday cake (that I asked for):

It was as tasty as it was badass!
It was as tasty as it was badass!

I might have turned 35, but I will never grow up. That doesn’t mean I haven’t grown or changed. Let me tell you a little story about my first birthday, which I totally remember. Don’t argue with me on that. It’s a fact. I remember one thing from my very first birthday.

I was seated in my high-chair where I consumed all of my food. What I remember is sitting there when a birthday cake was placed in front of me. And then I got mad. “This is too much,” I thought. “I could never eat all of that. Why would they even give me all of this?”

That was at 1, though. I’ve changed since then. If someone gave me a cake that size now I’d say, “This isn’t enough! Where is the rest?” I’d still be angry. That part wouldn’t change.

Water Commissioner

Why does someone’s political affiliation have anything to do with being the water commissioner?

I just received a political ad in the mail for someone who is running for the office of water commissioner and on the front read, So and So “Republican for Water Commissioner.”

What about any political party would make for a good water commissioner? At this point I’m asking a serious question. Is that something parties would even have standards for?

Maybe if the religious right were running I could see it. They might turn the water into wine (if they’re Lutherans) and I would be down for that. Except for when showering…unless it’s been a bad day.

I think I’ll go into the  cheese luffa business.

Actual YouTube Discussion

Earlier this week someone (illegally) posted Christian Bale’s audition for “Batman Begins” on YouTube. The video (which was awesome) included an explanation from director Christopher Nolan on the choice Christian Bale made for how Batman’s voice should sound.

One commenter said that they never understood why Batman would keep up the voice when people who knew who he really was were around.

I suggested that it’s because Batman has to stay in character. He can lose his focus if he did switch voices while in the Batman suit. It’s like Daniel Day Lewis in “Lincoln.” Everyone on the set knew he wasn’t Abraham Lincoln, but they still called him Mr. President and he stayed in character so he wouldn’t lose focus or the mindset. Then I suggested that maybe Bruce Wayne trained in the Stanislavski system after training with the League of Shadows.

In other words, I made a hilarious joke purporting that Bruce Wayne is a method actor.

Then, someone going by the handle “vidk1” said this:

That’s not even connected. Lewis (real person) stayed in character as part of his job and acting style (method acting). Batman (not a real person) talking to people who know he’s Bruce Wayne with his B-man voice makes no sense unless others who don’t know are nearby. It’s the same ballpark maybe, but how can you compare an actors work to a fictional characters way of interacting with other fictional characters?

Because he gets jokes.

My response was, “BRUCE WAYNE’S A METHOD ACTOR, YA’LL!!”

So, why am I sharing this with you?

Because the video was taken down for violating copyright law and this wonderful internet exchange has been lost forever…until now. We all can rest easy now.