The X-Factor

Now that the premiere episodes of the most hyped show of the season, The X-Factor, have aired we can talk about it.  Not how unnecessary it is, just “it.”

Seriously, don’t we have enough talent shows?  Among The Voice, American Idol, America’s Got Talent we should have found the next Michael Jackson 4 times over.  Instead we haven’t even found the next Bobby Brown…but I’m sure we’ve found the next drug-addled pop star.

The show is fine when compared to every other singing competition shows.  It maybe has too much pomp and circumstance, but what do you expect when Simon Cowell is involved?  At least my childhood crush and my current crush can be seen onscreen at the same time.

Oh, Nicole Sherzinger and LA Reid…you complete me.

There is one thing I noticed that is different about this show than American Idol – the sadness of the auditions.  Granted, when some young, tone deaf buffoon auditions it’s really no different.  And they try so hard…to look like a pop star.  Then they get so mad when they’re told they aren’t.  That happens on both shows.  But because there is no age limit on X-Factor that sadness is compounded when some older buffoon auditions.

I’m talking about the newly divorced mother who was told her whole life and by that no good ex-husband that she couldn’t sing.  But she believed in herself.  She just knew she could do it.  She’d show them!  Now’s her chance to show them all just how wrong they were.  X-Factor is here!  Step aside twinkies, let a real woman through.  I am gonna own this stage…with mediocrity.

It made me appreciate the age limit on American Idol.  It forces people who can’t sing, but are deluded enough to think they are the next American Idol, to face the music they can’t match the key of at a young age.
They don’t face it immediately.  They walk out of that audition all affronted.  “How dare they not pick me!”  But when they watch it when it airs…and they will…they will see for themselves that they stink.  But that’s good, because they see it at 22.  They get over it then and there.

But these people on X-Factor.  They went that extra 20 years of delusion.   For 2 entire decades, through the birth and raising of their children, they kept telling themselves, “I could make it if it weren’t for these kids.”  For years they thought they were singing beautifully to their children.  “My kids listen to me when I sing.  At least they did before they started talking and could ask me to stop.”

And then finally their chance came.  And it’s just sadder to see.  When you see some kid who can’t sing have their dreams crash and burn you think, “Eh, they’ll be alright.  They have their whole life ahead of them to figure out what their real gift is.”  But when you see a 43 year old so embarrassingly try to sing Heart’s “Barracuda” a small part of you dies with their hopes and dreams.

And that part that dies is the one that made you like that song.  For the love, can people stop butchering that song?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.