Uncover Letter

Why can’t we convey why we really want a job in cover letters we write?  Cut out all the crap and just get straight to the point.

“Hello, I’m Jason Farr.  I’m a local actor, comedian, and writer.  Buzz words, more buzz words, I’m great, blah, blah blah.  Listen.  I’m contacting you because I want to work with your company.  Your company is great and blah blah years of excellence blah blah I want a challenge blah.  That’s not really why I’m seeking work with you.

You see, there’s this girl.  I’m interested in her.  She’s pretty great, but I can’t take her out to dinner if I’m broke.  So that’s the real reason I want a job with you.  Cause I want happiness.  I want professional happiness, but I won’t be laying in bed at night nuzzling my job one day.  I’ll be nuzzling my wife and our beautiful children Will and Jada.  I’m not saying she’s the one, but how can I know without trying?  How can I try without going on a date?  So I need a job to pay for this date.

Hey, I could go anywhere just to get some job so I can have money to take this girl out on awesome dates.  And let me tell you, they would be awesome.  I’m clearly pretty clever.  But I chose you because I like you guys.

I’m not seeking just some job with you, though.  I’d work hard.  I need to keep a job.  For the steady income.  Cause ya see, there’s this girl…”

THAT should get me work.

Who wouldn’t appreciate that honesty?  Who wants some unoriginal shlub who structured a cover letter the way some blog told him to?  Where’s the passion?  Being straight up about why you want the work shows heart.

I bet it’s how most of John Cusack’s characters would apply for a job.

I’m doing this.

If they don’t respond to my cover letter maybe I’ll stand in front of their office playing “In Your Eyes” on a boom box.

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