How My Heart is Breaking This Week


Amy Sedaris is married?

The heartbreak is in the form of a question this week because nobody seems to know if it’s true.

Back in May the very lovely, quirky and talented Amy Sedaris said in another one of her famous appearances on Letterman that she was married to a man named Glenn.
The audience cheered.  They were happy for her.  Then she said Glenn was a disable merchant marine with no enamel on his teeth.  That’s when people got confused.

I didn’t find out about this until I came across her Wikipedia page this week where it was mentioned that she spoke of her nuptials on Letterman.
It was a heart sinking moment.  My friend Katy even wanted me to marry Amy Sedaris so Katy could move in across the street from us.

We had plans, Amy.  Just know that you’re not just breaking my heart this week.  You’re also breaking the heart of the adorable Katy.

We had plans.  We’d all bake together.  You’d make us laugh and then make us pancakes.  Show us the proper way to make cheeseballs.  It was going to be delightful.  But now the dream is gone.  No pancakes.  No cupcakes. No Lemoncellos.

I’m so sorry, Katy.  Saying that might be the hardest part.

And that’s how my heart is breaking this week.

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